Sunday, November 21, 2010
PRACTICE? COME ON MAN, IT'S PRACTICE.
THIS IS CHRIS BOSH OF THE MIAMI "GOD SENT US TO WIN SO WE WONT LOSE" HEAT TALKING ABOUT HIS HEAD COACH. "HE WANTS TO WORK AND WE WANT TO CHILL". "HE IS GOING TO HAVE TO MEET US HALFWAY". WELL, THE LAST I CHECKED YOU ARE 8-5 SO MAYBE CHILLING ISNT WORKING. COACHES/OWNERS JUST DONT HAVE THE BALLS TO SIT GUYS LIKE THIS. THEY DO WANT THEY WANT. I WANT TO BE A MILLIONAIRE SO I CAN JUST CHILL. I'M ONLY $992,667.57 SHORT. HELP A BROTHA OUT.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
OH NO!
The old broke back syndrome. Experienced it. That jacket he has on feels like 200 lbs. I feel ya bro. I feel ya. Hang in there and find that inner balance.....or just have another drink. Might as well, not much you can really do anyway.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
WAS SHE OR WASNT SHE? YOU MAKE THE CALL
Why they didn’t just give her a breathalyzer I’m not quite sure, but that’s not the point of this blog. For me the highlight was clearly the face she made when somebody finally said “gas pedal” to her. Like duh obviously gas pedal…what do you think I’m stupid?
Friday, November 12, 2010
RIDICULOUS ANSWER ON FAMILY FUES...AND ITS RIGHT!
Nekkid grandma? Really? I always like to think that people do and say stupid stuff on television because they’re just nervous. But I don’t think I can even make the case for that here, I mean he said it with such conviction. And the other contestant agreed with him, it’s not that it’s a false statement, no one wants to see your nekkid grandma if you break into a house. I’ve never been on a game show before but I would not be one of those happy go lucky contestants “just happy they had a great time.” I’m there to win MONEY. I would never scream nekkid grandma no matter how nervous I was. I would be the one taking everything way too seriously and then I would punch Steve Harvey in the face. No, not really.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
EPIC FAIL/DID YOU KNOW
Did anyone else see this article?
Well, today I saw on the news that Mobile is going to have ANOTHER indoor football team. I saw it on the news. I watch the news you know. Well, they told me "for more information go to www.mobilebaytarpons.com. Guess what? It's not working. Under maintenance. Not good. Not good at all. And I know a few things about Marketing.
Well, today I saw on the news that Mobile is going to have ANOTHER indoor football team. I saw it on the news. I watch the news you know. Well, they told me "for more information go to www.mobilebaytarpons.com. Guess what? It's not working. Under maintenance. Not good. Not good at all. And I know a few things about Marketing.
EPIC
Seriously that had to be the most epic match race in the history of the 100 meter hurdles between the girl in red and the girl from CM. I mean imagine if you had money on this? The swings in emotion would have been unbearable. One second you got a 2 hurdle lead and the next second your runner is lying face down on the ground and two hurdles behind. Tripping, falling, skipping hurdles etc. This had it all and then some. Like how many times do you see 10 yard leads evaporate in a 100 meter race? Never. But in this race it happened 4 times. Just back and forth, back and forth, back and forth it went all set to the NFL Films music. It was like the Thriller In Manilla only a zillion times better. An absolute race for the ages. So I don’t know whether it makes these girls courageous or stupid for finishing, but it’s definitely has them in the running for a top 100 video of the century.
Saturday, November 06, 2010
Thursday, November 04, 2010
THE BOG'S LESSONS OF LIFE: VOLUME 1
{BLOGGERS NOTE: THIS BLOG ACTUALLY STARTED BACK IN 2008 AND EACH ONE WAS WRITTEN WRITTEN OVER A COORS LIGHT OR A BOTTLE OF BOONE'S FARM)
Jimmy was always small. In elementary school, the boys would pick on him and call him "Shorty," "Runt" and "Jimmy." He was also shunned by the girls, who would snicker at his thick glasses and extra arm.
But Jimmy always carried hope that one day, others would view him as special as his parents viewed him. They would see beyond the physical oddities and witness a brilliant and subtle mind that was full of compassion, kindness and ninja tactics.
One day, a fireman came barging into Jimmy's classroom.
"The gymnasium is on fire. We need every extra hand we can get! Come on!"
Jimmy looked down at his extra arm. He knew what he had to do. He closed his notebook and rose from his desk. He waited for all the kids to scurry through the door before he stole the teacher's purse, bought liquor and three-fisted it behind the Dumpster as the sirens wailed.
LESSON: We all can't be heroes.
John huffed down the sterile hallway, his slippered feet gaining unsteady traction. His eyes nervously glanced down at the tray full of rattling test tubes. "I must get these to the safe room," he thought.
He heard gunfire behind him. The Libyans were advancing. He knew he couldn't let the tubes fall into the wrong hands.
Botulism. Ebola. Plague. The labels frightened him even more than the report of gunfire up ahead. If a tube broke, death would spread quickly through the metropolitan area, and then the Western Hemisphere.
As he rounded the corner, a pack of Camel Lights on the security guard's desk caught his eye. He balanced the tray on the desk and fiddled impatiently with the lighter.
Then, almost as if in slow motion, the tray fell and shattered into a smoldering, jagged heap. John slid his back down the wall and sat on the floor. He inhaled the Camel smoke deeply and checked some scores on his iPhone.
LESSON: Don't sweat the small stuff.
Madge was a middle-aged woman with an anger-management problem. She had driven an honest-but-simple husband away, and was now left alone in the small house, with plastic fruit on the table and a defunct mower in the shed.
She wondered where it had all gone: the dreams, the plans, the left foot. She dipped a pudgy stump in the bath water. With romance novel clutched in hand, Madge reclined in the water and began reading about the man with the long hair, kissing the maiden with a tender tongue.
Suddenly, a brilliant flash appeared around her, and Madge felt more alive than she ever had; electric in fact. Before it went dark, she saw the clown silhouetted in the doorway, and the toaster in the tub.
LESSON: Don't trust clowns.
Stay tuned, but until then here is a thought: You know the saying "A bird in hand is worth two in the bush." How much is it worth when you "beat around the bush?"
Jimmy was always small. In elementary school, the boys would pick on him and call him "Shorty," "Runt" and "Jimmy." He was also shunned by the girls, who would snicker at his thick glasses and extra arm.
But Jimmy always carried hope that one day, others would view him as special as his parents viewed him. They would see beyond the physical oddities and witness a brilliant and subtle mind that was full of compassion, kindness and ninja tactics.
One day, a fireman came barging into Jimmy's classroom.
"The gymnasium is on fire. We need every extra hand we can get! Come on!"
Jimmy looked down at his extra arm. He knew what he had to do. He closed his notebook and rose from his desk. He waited for all the kids to scurry through the door before he stole the teacher's purse, bought liquor and three-fisted it behind the Dumpster as the sirens wailed.
LESSON: We all can't be heroes.
John huffed down the sterile hallway, his slippered feet gaining unsteady traction. His eyes nervously glanced down at the tray full of rattling test tubes. "I must get these to the safe room," he thought.
He heard gunfire behind him. The Libyans were advancing. He knew he couldn't let the tubes fall into the wrong hands.
Botulism. Ebola. Plague. The labels frightened him even more than the report of gunfire up ahead. If a tube broke, death would spread quickly through the metropolitan area, and then the Western Hemisphere.
As he rounded the corner, a pack of Camel Lights on the security guard's desk caught his eye. He balanced the tray on the desk and fiddled impatiently with the lighter.
Then, almost as if in slow motion, the tray fell and shattered into a smoldering, jagged heap. John slid his back down the wall and sat on the floor. He inhaled the Camel smoke deeply and checked some scores on his iPhone.
LESSON: Don't sweat the small stuff.
Madge was a middle-aged woman with an anger-management problem. She had driven an honest-but-simple husband away, and was now left alone in the small house, with plastic fruit on the table and a defunct mower in the shed.
She wondered where it had all gone: the dreams, the plans, the left foot. She dipped a pudgy stump in the bath water. With romance novel clutched in hand, Madge reclined in the water and began reading about the man with the long hair, kissing the maiden with a tender tongue.
Suddenly, a brilliant flash appeared around her, and Madge felt more alive than she ever had; electric in fact. Before it went dark, she saw the clown silhouetted in the doorway, and the toaster in the tub.
LESSON: Don't trust clowns.
Stay tuned, but until then here is a thought: You know the saying "A bird in hand is worth two in the bush." How much is it worth when you "beat around the bush?"
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